Sunday, February 17, 2008

The One with....Mixed Feelings

Blog seems to be my bestest of friends nowadays i guess. The very place where i can talk about so many things. The deepest thought of this complicated lady has been honestly channeled here and i consider this blog as that board i have in the classroom where the teacher can actually right everything from fact to examples.

I woke up with this mixed feelings. It is difficult to explain but i know its kinna hurtful. Like life is being ripped out of my body. Like suddenly this big block of concrete forcefully crushed my body. Why? I dont know. I just felt so empty and lonely. Im scared of being hurt again and again. And i can feel its coming straight to my face this time.

After almost 2 years, ive got to feel that feeling again. I mean, all this while i thought i'll never ever come across that. It was beautiful and glorious. I felt so blessed at that time, thinking, "Yeah...this is how it used to be. And this feels so right...so damn right!" It is like putting pieces of puzzle together and it fits. Damn it fits. I dont want it to end. But i know it will because i can feel it. Im devastated because honestly...I dont want it to end but i cant let it stays. Dear Allah....if you can hear me, i just want you to know it is perfect, but i know you jested me once again. Save me from all these pains please because I cant take it. But i thank you for giving me that time. It was precious. I was happy and I was truly blessed...Thank You.

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